What Is Healing? (Part Two)

It would be rare to find a person who has travelled through childhood unscathed by emotional wounds. You may be surprised to learn that many of these unconscious wounds have seemingly innocuous origins and you may not even be aware that you carry them. At some point in time when you were a young developing infant you may have felt your survival threatened, and this may have occurred as early as conception or at any time in utero. As a developing child, you were continually attuned to the emotional responses of your mother. If your mother was sad, you would have emotionally picked up on that sadness and carried it in your emotional body. If your mother was emotionally stressed, you would have picked up on that emotional stress and carried it in your body. If your mother was emotionally needy, you would have picked up her emotional neediness and carried it in your body. If your mother and father were struggling in some way and their relationship was not healthy, you would have picked up on that struggle and carried it in your body. If your mother was in mourning, you would have picked up her grief and carried it in your body. For example, if your father had been killed in an accident or died by other causes while your mother was pregnant with you, you would have emotionally felt mother’s pain and sorrow in your body. You would have also felt mother’s tight grip energetically around you to keep from miscarrying and facing the loss of you as well.

In response to all of these situations, the tiny baby you developed an emotional response strategy to survive and may have unconsciously offered to carry mother’s emotional pain, trauma, or neediness. Babies and children do this out of love and loyalty to their parents and the greater family system. In addition, perhaps your birth was traumatic in some way or you were put in an incubator for the first few weeks of your life. Perhaps mom was too busy to pick you up when you were crying for attention. Perhaps mom was under her own stress or had emotional issues lingering from her own childhood; unable to fully be there emotionally for you when you were a baby. Perhaps you were separated from your mother and/or father as a young child. As well, there may still be unresolved wounds in the greater family system that have not been openly addressed. In some situations these wounds may not feel innocuous, especially in situations where there was abuse, violence, or lack of safety in the home.

Due to each of these early experiences, the adult you now continues to receive messages from your deep unconscious in the form of symptoms or relationship difficulties because something needs to be recognized, acknowledged, or healed, or if something or someone in the family system needs to be seen. Healthy supportive healing work is done without blame or judgement, and in fact, it is meant to create the capacity for compassion and love for self and others. We simply look back to the past long enough to see “what is” in the family system, something that is referred to as our primary scenario.

When healing within occurs and we feel connected to our core self, the unconscious no longer feels driven to deliver messages through symptoms of the body or relationship difficulties. Healing is an energetic shift or movement that occurs in the emotional body, accompanied by an easing of emotional longing, pain, or other symptoms in the physical or mental bodies. You are not able to think yourself to wellness and you are not able to cure yourself to wellness. When looking for answers for your conditions or issues, it’s important to remember that the physical or mental health symptoms you may be experiencing in your current life may be systemic. You may carry physical, emotional, spiritual, or relationship issues to raise awareness of unresolved emotional wounds or traumas for your parents or the ancestors of your family system.

Healing begins within and radiates outward. If you only address your outer physical symptoms through any type of medical system, whether that is western allopathic medicine, eastern medicine, or alternative practices, you will not experience full healing. If you only focus on your symptoms or issues from an individual viewpoint, ignoring the greater family, ancestral, or environmental systems that surround you and energetically embrace you, then you will not experience full healing. Even if a medical cure is available for your symptom, and the harmful or malignant cells are eradicated in some way, the deep emotional patterns that contributed to the symptom in the first place will continue to seek out your attention if they are ignored.

If your underlying emotional wounds are not addressed, these unconscious emotional response strategies or patterns developed in utero and in early childhood for survival will continue to call to you through repetitive relationship difficulties, more persistent or diverse symptoms, or a reoccurrence of your condition or situation.

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