Systemic Family Constellations Questions

Before your 1st Session you might like to consider some of the answers to the following questions in relation to your own family system.  You don’t have to write down the answers to the questions or send them to me in advance.  I encourage you to check with other family members if you don’t know the answer to a question.  Don’t worry if you don’t have an answer – what you do know will likely be enough.  The list is rather lengthy but the answers will provide valuable information for your own healing journey.

  • Who died tragically in your family?
  • Who experienced a significant trauma?
  • Who died too early?
  • Who died during childbirth?
  • Who was stillborn?
  • Who was miscarried?
  • Who was aborted?
  • Who was given away through adoption or foster care?
  • Were you born premature?
  • Were you adopted?
  • Was there anything unusual or difficult about your birth?
  • Did your mother experience any traumatic events while she was pregnant with you or in the first three years of your life?
  • Did you experience any emotional trauma or separations from mother in early childhood?
  • Did grandmother experience any traumatic events while she was carrying your mother?
  • Did you or anyone else experience a week or more away from mother at an early age?
  • Were you or your mother ever in the hospital, forcing you to be apart?
  • Were you ever separated from your father in your early years?
  • Did your mother and father go on any extended vacations or trips when you were young?
  • Were you or anyone else ever sent away to visit or live with other relatives or grandparents?
  • Are there any children named after family members who died tragically or too young?
  • Who did not have children?
  • Who was conceived by alternative methods (Sperm donors, invitro, surrogates, etc.)
  • Who was born out of wedlock?
  • Did you or your parents/grandparents have significant previous partners and what happened?
  • Did anyone get divorced?
  • Who did not marry?
  • Did anyone suffer a painful horrendous death?
  • Did anyone commit suicide?
  • Who suffered serious injuries?
  • Who was institutionalized? (psychiatric care facilities, prisons, or other)
  • Who was wrongly accused?
  • Who experienced chronic physical illness?
  • Who had different physical abilities or handicaps?
  • Who experienced mental health, emotional, or psychological issues?
  • Who experienced war?
  • Who survived a traumatic event or war when others didn’t?
  • Which family members fought on different sides of a war?
  • Who was a war resister?
  • Who committed war crimes?
  • Who committed a violent crime such as rape, assault, murder, or sexual/physical abuse?  Was anyone the victim of violent crime? (Rape, assault, murder, or sexual/physical abuse)
  • Was someone deeply hurt by another?
  • Was anyone tortured?
  • Did anyone cause the death of another person either accidentally or intentionally?
  • Was anyone involved in slavery?
  • Did anyone gain through the suffering or misfortune of others?
  • Who felt responsible for someone’s death or misfortune?
  • Did anyone gain or lose a fortune?
  • Did anyone inherit when others did not?
  • Did anyone receive land unjustly?
  • Who took oaths, committed to social or religious organizations, or choose alternative ways of life?
  • Who immigrated and from where?
  • Who had to flee their homeland?
  • Who was driven from their homeland?
  • Who severed all ties with a homeland?
  • Who has/had addictions?
  • Did anyone leave?
  • Who was abandoned, isolated, shunned, or excluded from the family?
  • Who identifies as the black sheep of the family?
  • Are there ethnic or cultural differences amongst family members?
  • Are there differences in spiritual or religious belief systems amongst family members?
  • Who has a different sexual orientation?
  • Who had a tragic or heavy fate?
  • Who carried guilt or shame?
  • Are there any family secrets?
  • Who died in or participated in the holocaust or any other genocide?
  • If your life takes a turn for the worst, what is your greatest fear?

Peaceful Possibilities, Systemic & Family Constellations Calgary AB Canada, blends Family, Nature, or Organizational Constellations with an approach that is integrative, ancestral, body focused, and deeply ritualistic. It is a transformative rite of passage.

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